"i am barely breathing, i can't find the air...

[from some stupid 90's pop song]
I am having a hell of a time with even the most minor of tasks- Just sitting here my breathing feels constricted.. Bending to pick something up makes me feel like i can't breathe.. I'm always gasping.. Hauling my bags from the airport yesterday on very crowded trains was awful. No available seats, except for the one that some jerk purposely rushed over to fill when I was about to sit. Gggrrrr. By the time I got to where I was going I felt like just laying down in the middle of the sidewalk.

No I'm not a 98-yr-old chain smoker and/or coalmine worker. I don't think.

There's a bunch of (presumably spinal) fluid collected in my chest, which is quite unpleasant.. I am not breathing easily. I woke up this morning gasping for breath. I mean, I can breathe- It's just labored and never seems like quite enough air makes it.
This is definitely putting a crimp in my plans for this week. My neurosurgeon is just about impossible to reach, since he is Jewish and has a zillion holidays this month..

I am hoping they can do something temporary (like, a therapeutic thoracentesis maybe?) so that I can actually enjoy my upcoming (as in next week) trip to Hawaii for my brother's wedding.

:( It really pisses me off to be always left hanging w/ stuff like this. (^*&&(#@$&*$#@%!)#@$*&


Anonymous Anonymous said...

thats got to be an awful feeling. something about being in an airport and flying seems even worse. i hope you can feel better soon, i'd do the thoracentesis for you, but i've only ever done one. hang in there.

1:14 PM  
Anonymous Pk said...

Soooo sorry ... never had the fluid on the lungs like that ..but I have had the muscles in my chest wall and diaphragm refuse to move my lungs ... so I can identify ...

wish I could do something for you!

Praying for you even when I'm not around!


6:30 PM  

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